The Path to Obesity... is a swift yet tireless one. Yes, there are some sacrifices to be made, i.e. joints, some relationships, running, underwear, etc. etc. However, once you look past those petty sacrifices, you will find a path to greatness!

WHAT??!?!, you say?

If you are giving obesity, you are a heartless bastard pawning sweet and cholesterol-full temptations baked by the devil. If you are receiving obesity, you are most obviously a victim and ought to be pitied and cherished by mankind. Therefore, the less horrible of mankind, in its hypocritical loving way, will ostracize those who ostracize you and "cherish" you in hopes of ridding you of your "eating disorder." Fortunately for you, this causes more intake of food, making for a greater step in the path to obesity.
If you give and receive obesity, you are a most cherished bastard.

... I have not a CLUE what i'm talking about.